Valentine's Day

Yesterday I asked my son Sam the question I have asked him every February since he started kindergarten. “Is there somebody you want to get a special Valentine for? We could make one, if you want, or we can pick one out when we buy the regular ones….” This year, he embellished on the six-year tradition of polite refusal by rolling his eyes and saying “no” in a tone that translated clearly into “derrrrrr.”

I am not anxious for my twelve-year-old to be in love, or even smitten. In a twisted knot of irony of the type found only in motherhood, I am simultaneously delighted that he is not interested in girls, and worried that he should be. All around him crushes are blooming, complete with third-party intercession, texting after bedtime, and group movie “dates.” Sam finds the sixth grade romance scene ridiculous, in a benign and pragmatic sort of way. His best friend is a girl, and he listens kindly and without comment to her lengthy, high-volume and rapid-fire proclamations of love for various boys. He is waiting for her to stop talking so that they can do something interesting, like making a video or playing Xbox.

Valentine's day means many things to many people.

For most, it's a time to let your loved one know how you feel. To affirm your love with flowers, candy, or even jewelry, and hope it somehow translates into rough sex.

For me, it's always been a time of reflection, since the only rough sex I'm going to have is if throw myself on Rachelle while she's filing her nails.

Which she usually is when I throw myself on her.

Yes, for me it's a chance to look back at the way things might have been... ....had I not hooked up with someone dedicated to making my life a living hell.

Don't take my word for it. Watch the show, "Living With Ed", and see for yourself. That's why I did the show. It was that or install a Nanny cam. I wanted the world could see that I wasn't making this shit up.

Looking back fifteen to twenty years ago, I am amazed at the weighted significance I placed on Valentine’s Day gift giving.  It was forever the holiday filled with potential of making or breaking a relationship.  Those feelings all seem so ridiculous and childish now, but then, with very little relationship maturity under my belt, it all made logical sense.

When it came to giving the “right Valentine’s gift” I placed a lot of energy and time concocting my gift giving plan of attack.  I completely lost sight of what the celebration was about. Love. Right?

I distinctly recall dating a “certain guy” at the young and clueless age of twenty.  We had only been going out for a short time and Valentine’s Day was quickly approaching.  I know…the pressure.  There is nothing worse than an impending holiday like Valentine’s to put a young relationship to the ultimate test of failure or success.  At least that’s what I thought.

I was of course ecstatic.  I made this “certain guy” a very clever card, had a picture of us framed, made him my, “Yes, you will fall in love with me Chocolate Chip Cookies” and bought him a shirt.  I know the shirt sounds lame, unimaginative and pathetic, but believe me when I tell you it was a very cool shirt.  It. Really. Was.

"While we don't agree on the validity of this holiday, we still wouldn't refuse any of these items it they showed up on our doorstep. Love should be celebrated and we don't mind being spoiled." :)

Van Der Hagen's Shave Set
For the metrosexual in your life, this set (complete with soap, badger brush, stand and bowl) is the perfect gift. And at $20 a pop, how can you resist?

Big Love Ice Cream Spoon
We know, not another heart, but these heart shaped spoons are impossible to resist.

50 Cars To Drive
An all-star panel of car enthusiasts, including Jay Leno, select the 50 most memorable cars in the world. The 50 cars in this book could change your entire perception of the automobile.

Vosges Noir Truffle Heart
It may seem cliche to give chocolates, but this is no ordinary heart shaped box. Inside are the best chocolates the internet has to offer. If you live near one of their Purple House Boutiques, it's a must stop for the free samples and zany, stay-a-while decor.

Pukka Herbal "Love" Tea
A unique blend of rose, lavender, elderflower, chamomile and marigold petals. Love tea was made by Pukka’s herbalist for his then girlfriend on the day he asked her to marry him. She said yes of course.

Givenchy Le Soin Noir Set
For that super special someone worth splurging on. Complete with miracle creams that make you feel like a million bucks (probably because they're made from the rarest deep sea algae and gold flakes).

Bejewled Beauty
Flowers are an obvious choice to be sure, but we'd still like to receive some anyway.

Star Wars Cuff Links
Suprise the geek in your life with these poignant cuff links that capture their moment of true love. Han & Leia forever!