Hearing the news this week that American Samoa was among the states and territories holding caucuses on Super Tuesday set me wondering if their delegates might end up holding the balance of power in a deadlocked Democratic Convention. What would the Samoans demand in exchange for their votes? What would the candidates promise them?
Such fantasies are hardly new to me. For example, when the Democratic Party offered my friend Henry Beard and me the chance to host a delegation or two during the 1992 national convention in New York, we quickly chose American Samoa and Guam in hopes that the balloting would be stalemated and the tiny collection of delegates we were entertaining would be the key to deciding the presidential nomination. “We’ll control access to them!” we told ourselves. “We’ll be power brokers!”
Indeed, Henry and I had harbored similar delusions sixteen years earlier, when the delegates from Guam were our Manhattan guests during the 1976 convention. While en route to the ritzy champagne reception we had prepared for them, the Guamanians and their significant others managed to crowd into, and got stuck in, the sole elevator in Henry’s building, thereby missing the majority of the evening’s events. But that’s another story.
Alas, the first multiple-ballot convention since the Democrats nominated Adlai Stevenson in 1952 failed to materialize in 1992, just as it had in 1976. But, undeterred, we again threw an extravagant gala for our delegates, and, to avoid a repeat of our earlier mishap, we confined the festivities to the ground floor. A moving ceremony was conducted at which the name of “Gramercy Park” was changed to “Guamercy Park,” and an array of South Pacific-influenced hors d’oeuvres were served, accompanied by hearty shouts of “Please, Sir, I want Samoa!” Mayor David Dinkins, who had promised to send an important city official to the home of anyone who agreed to host a delegation, dispatched his Commissioner of Mental Health to preside over the occasion. All in all, we felt our hosting assignment had been a triumphant success.
Henry and I won’t be able to control access to the Samoan delegates if the 2008 nomination comes down to them after Super Tuesday. But we’re still kind of hoping – for old time’s sake – that it happens. And even if it doesn’t, we remain resolute in quest of our second great political goal: convincing Guam to hold the first primary in each presidential election cycle. You see, Guam is on the other side of the International Date Line, so even if New Hampshire moves its primary up to midnight on January 1, Guam can still be first. It makes perfect sense, doesn’t it? (On-line petitions will soon be available for your signature.)