Skeleton Seance Soup

jack-o-lanterns.jpg My sister thinks I’m a great cook. She thinks my chocolate chip cookies are perfect, my panini-grilled sandwiches are divine and my omelets, the best she’s ever had. My sister also thinks Kraft Macaroni and Cheese is a gourmet delicacy.

It’s not entirely true that I’m a bad cook. I make perfect eggs, and my sandwiches are divine. But, eggs and sandwiches aren’t exactly chocolate soufflé. Also, I cheat. I buy really expensive ingredients and do very little to them. If you have an incredible heirloom tomato and creamy goat cheese, all you have to do is slice and crumble and your friends think you’re a world-class chef. Drizzle fresh olive oil over it and throw a little basil on top, and voila, you’re on your way to Food Network super stardom.

But Brian wanted to make pumpkin soup.

Pumpkin soup involves way more than slicing and crumbling.

“Okay I figured out what we’re making for your mom’s magazine. It’s Halloween themed, so that way I can compose a scary song that people can listen to during the prep.”
“Your mom’s going to love it. Are you coming over?”
“Yea, but I’ve gotta run home and change first.”
“Yes! Into a witch costume!”

How can you not love him? He’s perfect, right? That’s why I CANNOT let him know how domestically challenged I am. At least, not this early in the game. But what the fuck do I know about pumpkins? Or soup for that matter? And we were going to do it at his house, so it’s not like I could have one of my domestic goddess friends pop in for a surprise visit just at the right moment. So, I did the only thing I could do. I wore the shortest skirt I own.

Only to find out Brian keeps the spatulas, screwdrivers and saran wrap all in the same drawer. And he doesn’t own any small plates. Needless to say the soup turned out, well, edible. But presentation is everything, right?




Maia Harari is a writer and choreographer. Her most recent credits include It's All in Your Head, 2003 and Danse Macabre, 2000, and she is currently working on Confetti, an episodic internet series chronicling the lives of twenty-somethings running wild in LA. She works at Spyglass Entertainment and lives in Los Angeles.